Stay-At-Home Mom: Expectation vs. Reality


When I first started staying at home with my now 7-month old twins, I had these grand expectations of what being a stay-at-home mom was going to look like.

I would clean the house, make dinner, do laundry, and take care of the babies, all while maintaining perfect hair and wearing a cute outfit. I would be able to shop, visit with friends, and still have daily bonding moments with each child. And lastly, I would sit on the couch and indulge in Netflix, while my happy babies slept peacefully in their cribs. 

Expectations vs. Reality for Me

Expectation: Being a stay-at-home mom means I have time to relax and recharge because I have all this time.

Reality: Exhausted by 6pm because from the second your children wake up to the second they fall asleep, it’s like a marathon sprint. This means our house often looks like the Allstate mayhem commercial. We’re lucky if I washed one load of laundry. Bonus points if I remembered to put it in the dryer.

Expectation: Having so much time that I could binge watch Netflix or read a book.

Reality: When my babies are asleep, I clean up the mess that they made while they were awake. I try to make myself something to eat but only warm it up before they are awake after only getting a 30 minute nap.

Expectation: Looking cute every day because I have more time in the morning to get ready.

Reality: Living in my leggings. My husband asked me the other day, “Do you even own pants?” And forget being able to fix my hair. My biggest day-to-day decision is bun or ponytail. And it’s a victory if I wear the same shirt all day without spit up, food or poop decorating it.

Expectation: I would have plenty of time to grocery shop and run errands.

Reality: By the time I’ve fed, changed, packed up the kids, driven to the store, unloaded, shopped, reloaded, carried both kids, and all the groceries back to the apartment—half my day is gone. And I forgot to run any errands.

Expectations vs. Reality for the Kids

Expectation: Having a baby that happily falls asleep and always has that wonderful fresh baby smell.

Reality: Bouncing, rocking, singing, holding. Doing anything humanly possible to get your child to shut their eyes for bed, only to have them blow out a diaper and smell like poop and pampers baby wipes.

Expectation: I would dress our boys in cute matching outfits all the time.

Reality: We go through two outfits a day minimum. They’re lucky if they’re even wearing the same pants they started the day in, let alone the same pants as each other.

What I’ve Learned from Being a Stay-at-Home Mom…

Even though it’s not what I expected, it’s unbelievably rewarding. I just needed a change in perspective. Being a stay-at-home mom is more than just being a mom. You become the dishwasher, janitor, maid, chef, entertainer and boss all at once.

I’ve learned that it means I gave up one title for a dozen others, but anything that’s worth having requires work. I am blessed with the opportunity to be at home with my children, and watch them grow up. I’m told the days are long, but the years are short. Though some days are longer than others, it’s absolutely worth it.

Hopefully one day soon I’ll have no bags under my eyes and I will trade my caffeine for a healthier alternative, but who knows! A girl can dream.

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Gerry is a military wife, and mother to identical twin boys, Gabriel and Gideon (born July 2017). Gerry is a first generation Vietnamese-American that was born and raised in Belmont, North Carolina. Some would say she has southern sass and a little twang to prove it. As graduate from the University of South Carolina (Go Gamecocks!) in 2012 with a degree in Mass Communications & Journalism, Gerry found her passion to be marketing which led her down a career path of multiple senior marketing roles, from non-profit to corporate marketing. After giving birth to her babies, she gave up her 9-5 to be a stay-at-home mom and was fortunate enough to be brought on as the Social Media Marketing Manager for Mountain Air Marketing here in Colorado Springs. Her family relocated to the area in January, and though they're typically beach lovers, they cannot get enough of the Springs. Though they have our hands full with their twins and their fur-baby, Murdock, they still find time to hike, explore and their favorite hobby- visit local breweries.


  1. hahha this is so spot on! guess what, I have literally no bonus points for the dryer hahaha and negative points for washing the washed, forgotten, laundry again:)))) this is such a refreshing take on my day:) Thank you!

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